By Elise Ottaway
I’ve been running retreats at Byron Yoga Centre for the past 10 years, and I think one of the greatest privileges of my job is getting to see what happens when people step away from their normal lives for a few days.
Over the years, I’ve seen pretty much everything. I’ve seen people arrive completely exhausted, burnt out, grieving, lost or at a crossroads in their lives. I’ve seen people who have spent years looking after everyone else finally take some time for themselves. I’ve seen people come because they know something needs to change, even if they don’t yet know what that change is. And I’ve also seen people arrive with their best friends or on a solo adventure, ready for a few days of yoga, good food, sunshine, swimming and a bit of time away from everyday life.
And I’ve come to realise that a retreat really is what you make it.
For some people, a retreat can be life-changing. I’ve watched people make huge decisions, change direction, find a part of themselves they had lost, or return home with a completely different perspective on their life. I’ve seen people arrive carrying something very heavy and leave looking lighter. Those experiences are incredibly powerful, and after 10 years, they never stop being meaningful to me.
But I’ve also learnt that a retreat doesn’t have to change your life to be worthwhile.
Sometimes you just need a few days where nobody needs anything from you. You don’t have to make dinner, answer emails, get the kids organised, be at work, keep everyone happy or think about what needs to happen tomorrow. You can sleep in. You can practice yoga. You can walk to the beach, sit by the pool, read a book, have a massage or have a long conversation with someone. You can do as much or as little as you want.
And honestly, sometimes that is exactly what we need.
I think we can put a lot of pressure on ourselves to come away from a retreat feeling transformed. We expect to have some big realisation, find our purpose, fix our habits or return home as a completely new person. But sometimes the most valuable thing you can do is simply stop.
When you step out of your usual routine, you get a little distance from everything. You can finally hear your own thoughts. You might realise you’re actually okay. Or you might realise you’re not okay at all. You might realise you’re exhausted. You might realise you’ve been putting something off. You might realise you need to make a change. Or you might realise that your life is actually pretty good and you just needed a few days to appreciate it.
I’ve seen all of these things happen.
I’ve seen people come on retreat alone and leave with friendships they never expected. I’ve seen couples, families and groups of friends reconnect because they finally have time to actually be together without the usual distractions. I’ve seen people rediscover yoga after years away from their practice. I’ve seen people who thought they weren’t ‘yoga people’ fall in love with it. I’ve seen people sleep, laugh, cry, swim, eat, talk, rest and simply be.
And I think that’s the beauty of a retreat. There isn’t one experience you’re supposed to have.
You can come looking for something deeper. You can come because you need space to work something out. You can come because you’re going through a difficult time and need somewhere to breathe. Or you can come because you want a few nice days in Byron.
You don’t have to arrive with a problem to solve.
You don’t have to have a breakthrough.
You don’t even have to do much yoga.
You just have to give yourself the opportunity to step away from the noise of everyday life and see what happens when you have some space.
After 10 years, I think that’s what I’ve come to understand about retreats. The power isn’t necessarily in the program, or how many classes you attend, or whether you have some huge transformational moment.
It’s in the pause. It’s in giving yourself permission to stop doing and start noticing.
And sometimes, when you finally have that space, you realise exactly what you need.
Sometimes that’s a life change.
Sometimes it’s a good night’s sleep.
And sometimes it’s just a swim, a really good meal, a yoga class and a few days where you don’t have to be anywhere else.
All of it counts.
I hope I get to see you on retreat soon, because no matter who you are, you deserve it.
